New barn, ice, and I love my boy!

Saturday was frigid!!!!! It wouldn’t have been bad if there was no wind, but the wind was blowing in such a way that it could only be described as bitterly bone-chilling!

Needless to say, CG and I didn’t ride. Instead, we had a nice spa day (hour) with Corona and Roller. I also practiced picking up all four feet from one side and was successful! Like last week, I’m not asking for Corona’s right front from the left due to the stiffness, but I got all three other feet from BOTH sides! I was thrilled! We also practiced heads down successfully.

After the barn, I went to check out CG’s new hobby farm. It was fantastic! It was bloody freezing so we didn’t spend a great deal of time out there, but it’s a really nice setup. The barn is HUGE! The main level has 6 box stalls which must be about 14×14 ft, it’s very airy and open with really wide aisles. There are four stalls on one side and another two on the opposite side. In the original design there should have been 3 additional stalls on the other side, but the barn was not completed (the previous-previous owner’s husband who built it died before it was finished). There’s no tack room, or feed room, but we’re planning on using one of the extra stalls as the feed room (locked door) and there’s a good spot for a tack room once we get some hooks and racks put up. The floor is just dirt, but CG is getting quotes on rubbing stall mats for the four main stalls and main aisle.

In terms of other buildings, there’s an old barn on the property which has 2 additional small stalls, then there’s a run-in shelter in the main paddock, and what’s going to become the chicken coop as well. There’s one main paddock which has wooden fencing around most, but page-wire only in a couple places, I’m hoping we can block off that page-wire as it’s a recipe for disaster. The other paddock needs some work but is a fairly good size as well. It looks like it was supposed to be 2 paddocks because there’s a portion of a fence in the middle, with a gate, but the plan will be to re-configure this anyway. Right outside the barn, there is a riding area which is apparently a sand ring. It’s not very big, maybe 40mx50m but it’s hard to tell with all the snow. There’s another unused area in front of the barn which we’re brainstorming how best to use as well. Overall – really good potential. My main concern is the safety of the fencing so hopefully we’ll be able to address that as one of the priorities.

The previous owner left the place absolutely filthy. Apparently her horses were given free range of the property, including both barns. The stalls were not bedded, but are absolutely caked in a layer of poop. She must not have cleaned it out….ever! Disgusting. There’s nothing we can do about it at the moment because it’s frozen solid, but there will be quite a bit of spring cleaning to come.

On Sunday, CG and I had plans to ride up the road since we haven’t been able to ride in at least a month due to the weather. Plans changed when I saw how great Corona’s leg looked and decided that I’d rather take him for a walk around the property instead so that he could get some much needed exercise! The Trainer was exercising a couple of the racehorses, and when he was finished he reported that the sides of the track seemed to have fairly good footing, enough to go for a walk anyways. I tacked up Corona and CG got Roller ready. Corona was so excited to get out, he hasn’t been ridden since before we found out about the fracture and the look on his face when I was putting his tack on was awesome.

It. Was. ICY! We got about half way up the long side of the track and called it quits. The horses were slipping around too much for our comfort and we were on the “good” side of the track. Much to Corona’s dismay, we turned around and headed back to the barn. All was well until we got about 30 ft from the barn…Roller decided to take his own path and somehow ended up trying to walk beside the coverall…he started to lose his footing. I was in front, and when I turned around I saw him go down on one knee, but he managed to right himself. I jumped off Corona as CG tried to steady Roller and get him off the icy patch he found. It was to no avail however and next thing I saw was Roller half-collapse / half-voluntarily lie down with CG still on his back. Luckily CG managed to get off without issue and was convinced he had hurt himself and couldn’t get up. I looked at him and it really looked like he just didn’t know what to do. CG was worried but I got her to give him his space, give him a second, and then we started asking him to get up from a distance. Sure enough, up he popped on his own accord. Phew. Roller is a great horse, he’s huge, but he’s very calm and tends to keep a cool head. I’m absolutely certain that when he was down, he was waiting for us to help him out and tell him what he should do. Such a good boy!

I must add here, that throughout this ordeal, Corona was cool as a cucumber…he just looked at his buddy as if to say, “what are you doing down there?” We took them both into the coverall for a couple of walking laps just to make sure all was well and then we went into the barn.

There’s never a dull moment…

Exciting news!

Fantastic news – CG and her husband have received and accepted an offer on their house! This was the last remaining condition on their purchase of the farm and now it all seems to be *almost* official!!!!

I am so happy about this! I’m also extremely nervous, as this means the three of us will be out on our own. We each have a lot of horse experience, but none have ever 100% been responsible for looking after a horse. Nonetheless, I am confident in my judgement and horse sense to take on this challenge.

The current closing date on the farm is the beginning of March, but the closing date that has been agreed to for the house is the end of January. CG is going to try to move up the closing on the farm, but worst case scenario they are able to move in with family in the interim. We’re not planning on moving the horses there until the fall, as this will allow us to get everything in order in the meantime. Depending how things progress out at the Boss’ however, I wouldn’t be surprised if things were pushed up.

I plan on initiating a dialogue with the Boss tomorrow about CG’s barn. Ultimately I’d like to be given the go ahead to take Corona as my own and keep him at the new barn. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about what the Boss’ reaction may be.

Something else to look forward to tomorrow – seeing the Trainer for the first time since last weekend’s blow out. I’ve been in this predicament before with the Trainer as I’ve eluded to in the past. I don’t want to say I forgave him for what he did that time, but I guess after a few weeks, I took more of the high road and just was civil to him for the sake of not making the barn an awkward place to be for myself and those around me. What he did last time was much worse than what happened last weekend, I don’t feel comfortable discussing the details on here, but it did involve him losing his temper. I have thought all week about how I’m going to be tomorrow, and to be honest, I’m not sure. As it stands right now, I’m just going to ignore him. He has already got his second chance from me and he will not be getting another. He is the type of person who knows how to manipulate others. He plays the victim all of the time, and somehow he gets away with it. I think he preys on peoples’ good natures and takes advantage of them. For example, he knows that the other girls and I are nice people who are respectful and polite. He knows we are not the type of people who can act like total bitches to people because it would likely bother us more than it would bother the object of our bitchiness. So, he lurks, he waits for an opportunity, and then he will begin to act like nothing happened and try to engage you in other conversations – often a funny story about his past, or something that happened at the store etc and then he’d ask you a question about it. He knows that we would find it difficult to be a bitch and just not answer, and this would be the little crevice that he would wiggle into and then sneak back into the inner circle. I’m truly going to make a conscious effort not to allow this to happen. Inevitably when I think about taking this stronghold, I feel a bit guilty about the awkwardness it will cause, but I have to remind myself how unpleasant things are when he is around, and how uncomfortable he makes us on a regular basis. I am choosing not to allow this type of drama in my life. I have too many good things going on, too many goals to strive for and I refuse to let these episodes ruin that for me!

Along with the good, may come the bad…

Excitement is in the air – but along with excitement comes nerves as well as questions about whether you’re doing the right thing.

First some background information to set the stage. The Boss is 75 years old. She rents her property, including the barn, and she doesn’t ride at all. The barn has 12 stalls in the main section and then there are an additional 3 stalls in the back area, but we avoid using these stalls when possible just because they’re not very accessible (especially in the winter when snowdrifts easily block access). At the present time, there are 13 horses at the barn: the Boss owns 4 riding horses (Corona included), there are 3 brood mares owned by a boarder, and then there are a total of 6 standardbreds which are at various stages in their racing careers. These standardbreds are either owned by the Boss, the Trainer, or the “Owners”. In addition to the Boss, the Trainer, and the Owners, the other main characters at the barn are myself and my 2 other riding friends, who I’ll hereby refer to as SM and CG, as well as the Boss’ ex-husband (who is also around 75 yrs old). I’ll be very blunt here – horse people can be extremely shady folk. I’ve had various experiences throughout the years, but all in all I think I was relatively sheltered from horse related drama. It seems this streak has been broken, and over the last couple of years, I have been exposed to more drama at the barn than should even exist. Some of the drama is the regular run-of-the-mill stupidity and looking back is actually quite funny, but there is also the type of drama that nobody should have to deal with and that makes you question whether or not you should stay or go.

The Boss doesn’t have any paid help at the barn. Up until about 2 years ago, she would do the majority of the work around the barn including turning the horses in/out, feeding, mucking all the stalls, etc. The Trainer and the Boss go way back, they have both been involved in racing for years. Since the Trainer has worked out of the Boss’ barn, he has essentially taken over turning the horses out each morning. Since the Boss’ ex-husband has been back on the scene (also for the last 2-3 years), he has come to the barn faithfully each afternoon and has taken over the duties of bringing in the horses each evening. He also has taken over mucking duty the majority of the time. Us riding girls go out to the barn on average about 2-3 times a week. I have a Monday-Friday 9-5 job, SM has a job that involves shift work, and CG is actually still in school as well as working, so we do work where we can, but it’s not at defined times throughout the week.

Over the last year or so, it has become more and more apparent that age is catching up with the Boss and that she cannot do what she used to, despite what she’ll admit. The Boss is a wonderful woman, she has an enormous amount of knowledge about horses and life in general and is a great friend. She is also a very proud woman and along with this trait comes a stubbornness to ask for help, or admit when things are not going so well. While I adore the Boss and greatly appreciate everything she has done for us over the years, I’ll be the first to state that we also don’t have all of the same principles about horsemanship. She has done things that I whole-heartedly disagree with, but that I have had to step back and bite my tongue or risk the relationship. This has been the same with the other girls as well and there have been a few major incidents this past year, in particular the last 6 months or so that have really left us asking each other, “what is going to be the last straw?”. Many of these incidents have also involved the Trainer who, to be blunt again, I cannot stand and do not trust.

The situation is that much more convoluted as a result of us girls not actually owning the horses we ride. We lease them from the Boss. All the times we have wanted to up and leave, we feel somewhat tied to the fact that if we leave, there is a chance that we may not be able to take the horses with us. Also – that we would jeopardize our relationship with the Boss.

It has always been the medium-term goal of CG to purchase a farm with her husband. It was in their 5 year plan. Luck struck about 2 weeks ago now and they’ve found a wonderful hobby farm of about 10 acres, complete with a new barn with 6 box stalls! The offer to purchase was submitted, accepted and now the only outstanding condition of sale is the successful sale of their current house! The original intention (time-wise) was that the purchase of this farm would coincide with the retirement of the Boss from the horse business and us girls would have a place to bring our horses. Tthe problem was that the Boss has always been non-committal about her intentions within the business and how long she was planning to stay in it. Now that CGs farm is purchased, somewhat earlier than anyone had initially thought, it is formally raising the question of, “what is everyone’s plan!?”.

In an ideal world, the Boss would see this purchase as a positive thing, would let us have our leased horses because she has no use for them (and she got all of them for free herself) and mentor us in new farm ownership tactics. In reality, the Boss’s reaction hasn’t been so encouraging or supportive, there has been nothing committed to about the horses, and no warm fuzzies about offering advice and guidance.

I think that the Boss has mixed feelings – I think this is forcing her to think about her intentions and what her plan is, especially if she doesn’t have us girls there. While she does have the Trainer there, they do not get along very well. There is a funny relationship there that is based on mutual dependency but there isn’t a lot of mutual respect. Also, it’s just not a sustainable operation, there is nobody there on a consistent basis who is able to look after the barn full stop. While I recognize that maybe the Boss doesn’t want to stop out of fear of what comes next, I really need to play the common sense card. I worry that if things continue the way they are, that someone is going to get hurt and also that the care of the horses will be sacrificed.

It’s a really tough position to be in, for myself as well as the other girls, and also for the Boss. I just wish that an honest discussion could take place so that we could start to make some progress and start to sort out all of these questions. I’m so excited about the new opportunity – but I don’t want to ruin relationships or rain on other people’s parades in the process. Advice welcomed!